Tuesday, April 24, 2007


What a great term… I first learned this term while in the Navy, Household pack-out, Squadron pack-out, Barracks pack-out. So you would think I pretty much have a handle on this…. Mmmmmm!!!!!!

The good people at “run for the wall” were thoughtful enough to have a suggested list of things people should take on the ride. A list of 50 items including “ 1 motorcycle” ( I think this was here for humor…or I hope so ) anyway I went through the list and checked off the things that were important (motorcycle) to the things I didn’t think were needed (underwear, after all we are bikers!!!)

First off when putting things together for a trip it’s important to separate items from what is actually needed (motorcycle, again) from what would be nice (blankets, pillows, pots and pans etc…). So I have gathered together all the things I will need to survive on the open road of America, keeping in mind the theme “camping” (the reality… days Inn)

Once again the wisdom of my bride prevails in an other wise chaotic mind, and I quote: “After a day of riding 400 miles on the back of a motorcycle, you (she has a way of making it sound personal) want me to sleep on the ground???” need I continue with the rest of that conversation….

So all I need to pack-out is the Credit card….(and of course the motorcycle)

On another note, we need to give Peggy a cool “Biker Name” something clean, but that reflects the nature of the bride and the trip… So all of the people that read this blog (both of you) think about it and make a suggestion. The person with the winning name will receive a Harley T-shirt from one of the many states we pass through. Pretty Cool…huh!!


Monday, April 9, 2007

How to Be a Biker

Ok try this for a while, I know it won't win any awards but it is a little entertaining.

It's a little long in tooth but its something to read until I can post.

I'm still trying to get video to load....so standby....

A Sarcastic & Satirical Poem by Todd8080

Bikers are a subculture, you might have heard folks say.

But how’s a man to join this clan? Must he ride every day?

Is there a special set of rules that helps define the rider?

And how long is this journey to becoming an insider?

Does one just go and buy a bike to claim their rightful place?

To get there will you need long hair and whiskers on your face?

Well, take heart, it’s your lucky day. I’m here to set you straight.

Just play it smart and act the part, then you won’t have to wait.

No dues to pay (unless you count the fortune you’ll be spending).

No greasy hands or club demands, it’s all done with pretending.

See, preparation’s paramount to taking on this role.

Without the right appearance you’re just one more rich asshole.

The “just-got-out-of-prison” look is what you must achieve,

So cultivate it carefully and you’ll make folks believe.

Naturally you’ll have to get yourself some Motor Clothes®.

The whole ensemble’s pricey, though, as every biker knows.

But that Official Uniform will suit you fine, you’ll see

(It’s sure to underscore your individuality).

Some new tattoos will show the world that you’re bad to the bone.

The tribal ones are popular, though which tribe is unknown.

Regrettably they hurt a bit; your skin will bleed and swell.

If that won’t do there’s fake ones, too, and they’ll work just as well.

Wearing helmets is for squares, so they should not be used.

Are you pro-choice? Have you no choice? Admit it, you’re confused.

Don’t bother thinking for yourself, mimic what others do.

Within a week you’ll go from geek to hardcore biker, too.

If all this seems like too much effort just to play a part,

Pretend it’s year ‘round Halloween and you’re a kid at heart.

And what about the bike itself? Is pristine paint taboo?

It’s true that chrome won’t get you home, but neither will bird doo.

Adorn your scoot with skulls and flames so there can be no doubt:

You scoff at death with every breath, it’s what you’re all about.

A bunch of Maltese crosses is another way to go.

What do they signify? Who cares, they’re only there for show.

The bike is just a prop you see, stage dressing in your play.

In full attire you’ll inspire all eyes to look your way.

I’m sure you’ve heard loud pipes are cool; they’re proof that you are tough.

Who cares if neighbors’ kids can’t sleep, too much is not enough!

Don’t bother learning riding skills ‘cause you were born to ride.

Cars can’t ignore your mighty roar, they all will move aside.

One thing that’s very crucial is to have a wide rear tire.

It won’t improve performance, but then that’s not your desire.

Again, it’s all about the look; fat rubber implies power.

They’ll never know your bike won’t go a hundred miles an hour.

Avoid the highway at all costs, the boulevard’s your spot.

More folks will see you, long to be you, riding skills or not.

Mostly you’ll just park the bike and pose in public view.

The hoi polloi can eye your toy while idolizing you.

Of course you’ll need a trailer that can haul your iron steed,

Paint on the side that “Live to Ride” is your official creed.

And don’t forget to drink a lot, it’s part of the mystique.

It makes you seem more interesting, rebellious and unique.

Along with that comes attitude, the nastier the better.

No one can know a faux Brando was once a frail bed wetter.

Be sure to work on language skills, particularly curse words.

A well-placed “sh*t” or “f*ck” is nice, or maybe you know worse words.

All men are “bro”, all women “bitch” – this may take some rehearsing.

But then who can remember names with all that drunken cursing?

Brag about your bike, call it “your latest acquisition”.

Mention you own three to further bolster your position.

Status symbols don’t come cheap, you’ve earned the right to boast.

The most authentic biker is the one who spends the most.

Toss around some gearhead terms like “spark advance” or “VOES”.

So what if it’s all Greek to you, odds are no one else knows.

Just one last thing I must impart on how you should behave:

If in our travels we should pass, please don’t forget to wave.

Oh, I’m not saying I’ll wave back, but then I’m not a bro.

I’ve just been riding all my life, so hell, what do I know?


Monday, April 2, 2007

Mid-life crisis or not

Almost every Sunday Peggy and I go riding with our gang..(actually, they let us ride with them)

We do this because we felt it would be really cool to ride the open road with 30 or 40 other bikers.

(People have a tendency to get out of the way when you roar by)

When I was younger and riding, the guys I shared the open road with were the ratpack of the biker world, the bad boys of our time. We were the wannabe outlaw gang, ransack, and pillage a town type of bikers. We went to all the movies (billy jack, easy rider, wild bunch etc...) we would scowl at the people in their cars as we rode by, all-in-all we were a pretty pathetic bunch.

All of us held jobs during the week so our pillaging had to take place on the weekends and only with the wifes and or girl friends permission.

So where am I going with this, fast forward 30 to 40 years, No longer do we want to pillage.

(not only is it hard on the lower back, but I'm not certain what it is)

BUT the ride is still like the call of the wild (metaphor!!)

If you take away the bad boy stuff, what you have over the years hasn't changed. The freedom of the open road, the wind in your face and bugs in your teeth.(God, it's great to be a biker!!)

Back to that mid-life crisis thing. My friend Bob Bitchin told me life's journey is about experiences, we are the sum total of all of the scars acquired along the way. (BTW, thats his real biker name)

I feel very good about myself to date, there are things I would change if I could but then I have to wonder after the incredible journey I've had through life to change anything would change who I'm today.....wow pretty existential (where's a metaphor when you need one)

It's taken a long time to learn “honor”, and to try and be a better person. I've found It's because of the people that influenced and shaped my future, from cousin Phil who had a major impact on me (and never gave up) when I was younger and even today I hold him up as a roll model. To Peggy who to this day I don't understand why she took a chance on me. (Thank you, Thank you)

So you see, as we sit around the campfire of life(m) and reflect on how we got here, think about all the people who had an effect on making you who you are today.

So am I going through a mid-life crisis???....

Peggy would argue that one has to grow up first... I think I agree, Honey can I go ride my bike now ?